Self-Reverence Is Self-Love In Action

You have abundant reasons to deeply admire and respect yourself.

Alexandria Thibodeaux
4 min readNov 19, 2020
Photo by Haley’s Studio

I value a world where each human being honors a deep respect and admiration for themselves, because we each possess unique gifts and skills with unparalleled significance in contributing to the progression of humanity, and because each human being has triumphed over trauma. These truths represent each person’s extraordinary worth and value — this alone merits deep self-respect and self-admiration: self-reverence™.

What is Self-Reverence?

Self-reverence™ is the act and practice of revering the self.

“Reverence” is defined as a deep admiration and respect for someone or something.

This concept is common in many of our cultures and societies around the world — celebrity culture is a perfect example! Not just celebrities, it’s normal for us to revere a diverse range of people, such as family members, scholars, teachers, professional superiors, politicians, scientists, clergy members, activists, artists, etc.

And yet, rarely do we revere our very own selves.

Self-help and personal development arenas champion the concept of self-confidence and the mindset & actions of self-love — I’m here to say that self-reverence differs from self-confidence and that self-reverence™ is self-love IN ACTION.

And there lies the explanation: the difference between self-confidence and self-reverence™ is action.

Self-confidence vs Self-reverence

“Self-confidence” is defined as: a feeling of trust in one’s abilities, qualities, and judgment.

An example of self-confidence:

Before I became an entrepreneur, I had a corporate career that I absolutely loathed. I was successful in climbing the corporate ladder, yet I didn’t respect and admire myself for this “success”. Despite being unaligned with this career since day one of my three-year run, I consistently applied for and achieved annual promotions even though I hated working for that company and doing that type of work. After two promotions in two years, I went for my third. I wanted the job because it would provide a major increase in autonomy, freedom, and salary. I knew I would still be miserable at this company and still hate any type of work I was doing there in spite of much-coveted freedom and pay I was receiving, yet I applied anyway because I tricked myself into thinking it would all be fine.

It was not fine.

I digress.

I had confidence — I had trust — in my abilities, qualities, and judgment to get this third promotion. And I did get it. And — I did not respect or admire myself for doing so. I didn’t want the job, even though I briefly convinced myself I did. I did not admire my ability to charm others into offering me a job I didn’t value or actually want. Yes, I was pleased with myself that I accomplished what I set out to accomplish. And my confidence in my abilities, qualities, and judgments was solid. And, because I wasn’t putting my confidence in my abilities, qualities, and judgments into action to abundantly serve myself and others, I was absent of self-admiration and self-respect for those abilities, qualities, and judgments.

We cannot love what we do not respect. And we can’t admire what we don’t respect.

Self-reverence Forces You To Get Specific About Yourself

One could say they feel a strong sense of self-confidence because they haven’t faced that much adversity, things tend to go their way, and they’ve done well for themselves — this means they’re either privileged or complacent. With either one, there’s a lack of mindfulness and self-awareness. And without those, we can’t truly understand and know ourselves.

How can we revere ourselves if we don’t know who we are?

Get to know yourself so you can revere yourself — there are abundant reasons! This is not about being humble. Honor yourself with these questions:

  • What about yourself do you deeply love?
  • What’s your superpower?
  • What are you better at than anyone else?
  • What brings you joy that simultaneously serves you and others?
  • What fears have you overcome?
  • What trauma(s) have you overcome?

Deeply understanding the self provides us the clarity and certainty needed to nurture the inner-security to deeply admire and respect ourselves — because self-reverence is a radical concept for many. And it’s one that ultimately helps us to protect our peace.

When we admire and respect ourselves, our confidence in our sense of self, not just our abilities, qualities, and judgments, will be heightened.

Self-reverence & Trauma

Each and every one of us on this planet has and will continue to experience trauma — it affects everyone and escapes no one. And, you are here, on this earth, reading at this very moment, because you have triumphed over trauma. And we either reside and operate in a reality entrapped in web of trauma or we heal from it and prosper. You have overpowered the consequences of trauma and propelled yourself forward! You have honored and respected yourself by taking actions to become a victor instead of a victim! Overcoming both emotional and physical trauma is extraordinary and warrants infinite self-respect and self-admiration! This is a celebration of you, dear reader. A celebration of your choice to, as Brené Brown would say, choose courage over comfort.

Put your gifts into action to serve yourself, to serve others, and to ultimately contribute to the progression of our human society. Deeply admire and respect yourself and not just others, because when we revere ourselves, we maintain the confidence to boldly make positive impacts in evolving our human family for the better.

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